The last week or so has been awful. You know why? I let it be. I was self consumed with problems, mainly my husband's but I took them as mine. In that self consuming "worry", I took my eyes off Jesus and looked on my husband. I prayed almost constantly for Michael. I worried, I cried, I felt sorry for myself because he was having problems. In a way, I committed Idolatry. I put someone else before God. But I did it is such a way that I couldn't see it. I mean, I was praying for him. I was pleading his case, 15 times a day for him to God. And, it wasn't working, I was sinking deeper in. Well, I was talking to a precious friend, and she said something it the effect of, "Don't let Satan know where you have tied your goat." Huh? Think about it, it took me a second. My husband was my goat. I was not focusing on Jesus, because I was focusing on Michael, and I allowed Satan to get my goat. I was letting him affect my whole family, because I let him get me. Now, Michael is still in a mess. But I am not. I know that God will pull Michael up out of this pit, only when God is ready. But I don't have to jump in the pit with him. I quit telling God what Michael needs in my prayers, I bet God really hated that. Now, I am praying that God can help me keep my eyes on Him, and be the wife I need to be to help Michael through this. But I am helpless to do anything else. I am sure, I will falter on this. I have been of and on, even once realization hit. But at least now, I recognize the falter, and immediately try to focus on Jesus. Isn't it amazing how we let problems get to us, even when we think "I prayed, I gave it to Jesus." If you truly give it to Jesus, than you continue to look to him to help you, not back at the problem. When you are looking at the problem, you are allowing Satan to get your goat.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
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4 comments:
This is so true, very good post.
Awesome post!! Something I so needed to hear! I am new to your blog and found you via The LPM Blog. I have really enjoyed it here and plan on coming back. :-)
Blessings~
Karen
Thank you for such encouraging comments on my blog! You have a sweet place here! This was a great post!
Good post.
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